Confidence is the Key
The definition of confidence is “a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities.” The keyword here is “appreciation.” When you appear comfortable in your own skin, people react to it be being comfortable around you. The phrase “easy to be with” often applies to people who exude confidence. With that said, how do you use confidence and technique to get what you want from life, your relationships and your career? Here are five things you can do.
Give people who seek your attention the courtesy of stopping what you are doing. If you are in the middle of something, give that person a quick smile and a wait gesture to show that you will soon be available. You will find that people are more willing to wait for you when you do that, and gives them a good impression of your people skills. Ignoring someone who approaches you because you are doing something is bad manners. There is no excuse for bad manners.
Always look at people in the eye. Eye contact makes it easier for you to read signs about the person in front of you, and to gauge their reactions. This can help you make decisions about how you should act and what you should say to get the desired outcome. For example, if you are in a job interview, and you see that the interviewer reacts favorably to what you just said. This is the time to expound on it to drive the good impression home.
A confident person lets someone else take the stage. When you are in a conversation, let the other person talk. Talk just enough to keep the ball rolling, but pay attention to what is being said. A good technique is to repeat a portion of what he or she just said as a prompt or for clarification; this demonstrates that you are listening. It does not matter if you are interested in basketball; the point is to make the other person feel important in that moment in time. This can pay huge dividends later on.
If you start to feel emotional about a conversation or situation, give yourself time to regroup. Getting into a shouting match with someone solves nothing, and just makes a lot of noise. Always strive to be in control of yourself in what you do and say. No matter how asinine or provocative the other person is, continue to adopt a reasonable tone. If the conversation starts veering off course, you will be in a better frame of mind to keep it firmly on topic. In other words, be on top of the situation at all times.
A confident person is a decisive person. Do not be afraid to act if you believe that it is the right thing to do at that moment. Once you do, do not waste your time worrying about it. The minute you start second-guessing yourself is the minute you start losing your confidence. Come hell or high water, commit to what you have decided.
Confidence is perhaps the most potent weapon in your arsenal when it comes to dealing with people on a personal or professional basis. You can get anything out of life if you know how to wield it properly.